Fear Busters: Turning Worry Into Wonder

A few days ago, in a rush to brunch with friends, I backed our SUV (with 'gusto') smack into a large snowbank on the side of the driveway. This particular snowbank was immediately above a culvert - a 3 foot embankment we had newly landscaped with rocks and grasses this past summer. The front left tire was barely touching the driveway, the rest of the vehicle slanted downward precariously - and I became convinced of the likelihood (not just the possibility) of the following things:

1. We would need to pay money to excavate the SUV.
2. Our landscaping would need to be re-done.
3. Rocks would damage the underside of the SUV resulting in need for car repairs.
4. Even a tow-truck would have difficulty dislodging us since the driveway was mainly ice.
5. Someone could get seriously hurt in the process of trying to push the SUV from behind.
6. Our entire afternoon would be spent attempting solutions.
7. I might be without a car for at least the next few days, or until Spring.

I shared most of these concerns with Ed (as calmly and positively as possible) on our way to brunch in our second vehicle, while voicing strong, yet polite, aversion to his opinion that it probably wouldn't take much to fix this. At the time, I remember saying, "I feel really strongly about this, Ed... but I honestly don't know whether I'm catastrophizing, or just being intuitive."

The result? After enjoying a great meal, our brunch friends drove home with us and, (in the less than 10 minutes it took me to don my boots, jeans, warmer coat, hat, mittens, scarf and fierce determination), the SUV was easily dislodged with a tow rope and their Mountaineer. On the first try. Not one blade of landscaping grass crushed. No rocks visible. No one had to attempt to push. I watched, and giggled in awestruck delight... then immediately began to soak in this important lesson...

I forget this quote's author and exact words, but here's the gist of what someone smart once said or wrote: "Worry doesn't work; there are only two options. Either you're wrong and you've wasted precious energy, intellect and time. Or, if you're right - all you're left with is the dim satisfaction of being right. That's all - it fixes nothing, prepares you for nothing."

If I'm honest, I've always been slightly annoyed with people who advise, "Just live in the present." Some of us (Intuitives particularly) are actually wired to think of future possibilities. There is purpose for this, and beauty - just as there are benefits of being rooted in the practicality of the present. So how can Intuitives (and any other worriers) turn worry into wonder?

My new motto for 2008: "Choose a new what-if". I can't (and don't want to) stop thinking of future possibilities - it's against my grain and would shut me down. But I can and will choose to take captive fearful thoughts disguised as intuition, and turn them into positive possibilities. What if the Mountaineer is stronger than I think? What if Eva comes home in February? What if my job lets me cut to 20 hours? What if God is REALLY good - no matter which possibilities come true? What if He REALLY loves me and has my BEST in store?

Is this a bunch of 'pop psychology', 'positive thinking' mumbo jumbo? I'm still in the process of fully testing, but I don't think so. Scripture backs it up:

"Whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things [...] put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you."

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him..."

This, I believe, is a path worth walking down. Busting fear and worry has been an important theme for me in 2007. I have, by no means, "arrived", but am ready to process externally about this path on which He's so tenderly led me. Fear-busters yet to come: 'Self-Compassion vs. Self-Worship', 'No Fear In the Moment', 'Redemption vs. Worm Theology', 'Reserving the Right to Disagree - With Myself'... there might be more too. Don't worry, I'll fill in the generous gaps with lighter fare.

Thanks for reading, friends; looking forward to being back 'in the loop'!